Guest Post: Take Care.

Am glad you are away I got to listen to Drake and was blown away Haha, I actually deleted your number coz I overwhelmingly panicked that you were still in love with your ex I don’t even know why It broke my heart I guess I always wanted to be that someone to you A…

Of Elections, Politics, and Amina …

She emerges from the bedroom, half naked, exhausted, moist sweat all over her body.  A smile’s on her face. “That was awesome,” she smiles again as she sips the glass of water. She hasn’t felt that way in a long time. A cool breeze flows in through the open kitchen window, blows gently on her…

Amina, Amina, Goodbye Dry Spell.

Remember the 1920s? And the dinosaurs? And the Agrarian Revolution? Me neither, I don’t remember.  I wasn’t there. You weren’t there too, so forget whatever it is that you thought I was going to say next that makes sense about the 1920s. I was just saying things that don’t even have any meaning. But I’m…

Dear Diary…

“Wee, Gili utakunywa?” “Zii, mi staki, ka mnanunua nunueni tu.” That’s Gilbert, the guy that never wants to contribute money for the drink but will drink his ass off more than even the owners of the drink. And that was the phone call between me and Gilbert, the phone call that ignited everything. You see…

Are You There, Vodka? It’s Me.

It’s the third week of March, we’re not dead yet. At least I ain’t dead, let me speak for myself. Maybe you’re dead. Me, I’m still alive and kicking (though I don’t even know what I’m kicking) Donald Trump’s still the president over there in the land of Beyonce. Over here across the wall, we’re…

Mum, Sex and Overated Valentine’s

It’s Valentine’s Day again, everyone’s orgasmic about it. Shopping here shopping there, presents here porn there. People are having sex, licking each other while speaking in tongues like it’s some revival. And yes I just had to put the sex part  there, last week I got laid, so I can go and tell everybody…I’m the…

Death Of A Bachelor

Five beers later, I’m on the rooftop. I die tonight. I hate you! I yell. I scratch my face. Take another sip. I swallow… Another sip. This one I spit out. Then I pour some down, libation to the ancestors. One for Biggie Smalls, 2Pac isn’t getting any,  I hear he’s still alive in Uganda…